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Amazing Husbands make the Best Dads
Daddy Daughter Bonding – 1 Month Old
“What are your expectations when it comes to who will be responsible for what chores after baby arrives?” It was a question posed in the mid-pregnancy educational class we attended last February. Whose job would it be to make sure the diapers and wipes were well stocked? To take out the dirty diapers each night? The class instructor had everyone fill out a ‘mine’ and ‘theirs’ work sheet as we waited for everyone attending the class to arrive. No peeking!
Up until that point Domingo and I hadn’t really discussed diving up the baby chores. We had discussed our general parenting philosophies such as how we felt about sleep training and discipline. We made sure we were on the same page when it came to what kind of parents we envisioned being, what we wanted most for our daughter and our expectations as parents. But the day to day chores didn’t come up.
I gave myself 100% of the responsibility of feeding baby (kind of hard to share that one when you plan on breastfeeding) and night time baby care. I figured there was no sense in us both being up if I had to be awake to feed the baby anyway. (I referred to it as our zone defense strategy.) For everything else I split responsibilities 50/50. I thought Domingo’s sheet would look the same. Wrong! Domingo gave himself 70% of the responsibility of diapering and 100% of household cleaning. As he saw it – if my job was to feed the baby, his job was everything else. Cooking, cleaning, he expected to take on a lion’s share of the chores. But he didn’t expect to stop there. He expected to be awake at each and every feeding.
And he meant it.
After a long day at work, he comes home and is ready to take a shift with the baby to give me a break. Always. On days that Nicki is home from day care, he comes home from lunch to make sure I have something nutritious to eat. Always. Without fail or complaint.
My idea of a zone defense was a bit naïve. Most days it can work, but some days I just need a little extra sleep or a second pair of hands. This morning was one of them. Even though Domingo went to bed after me, he got up to feed the baby. After she eat, she fell asleep immediately in his arms. Rather than risk waking her, he stayed with her in the rocking chair. I woke up to find them there an hour later.
I have the Best Daddy Ever! – Three Months Old
I knew I hit the jackpot with Domingo. I knew he was the kind of guy I wanted to spend the rest of my life with the first time I met him. I knew he was the kind of guy I wanted to be the father of my children before we even started dating. It was the first time I was in a relationship and could see myself in the roll of wife and mother, not just girlfriend. Still, he blew away my expectations. He is all I could ever have wanted and more. How did I get to be so lucky? Amazing husbands make for the best dads.