Archive for the ‘Life’ Category

March 12, 2018

Dana At Two Months

Dear Dana,

Nothing tugs at a mamas heart strings more than her last baby growing out of newborn size clothes, or newborn diapers, or needing the newborn insert removed from the car seat. You passed all three milestones at once, right around six weeks. You’re now up to 10lbs, and the 30th percentile for weight. There’s no denying that my itty bitty is growing. I’m trying to soak in as much of your newness as you as I can; your velvety soft skin, the sweet new baby smell, the silky soft hair atop your head and the peach fuzz in back. As happy as I am to see you growing, a piece of me wishes you’d stay this way forever.

New things you are doing this past month include smiling, holding, and coo-cooing. You started smiling just after you turned one month. You’re still really good at what Daddy and I call “concern face”, a furrowed brow and skeptical stair, but now you’ll just back and forth between the biggest smiles and concern. In terms of holding your very good at clenching your fist around my hair when I hold you, and once held onto the hem of my shirt when you wanted to nurse. You’re even good at hooking the toys of your gym with your toes. I thought it was just coincidence, but you’ve done it multiple days and I have the photographic evidence! You’re not grabbing yet, but should something venture near you, it’s yours.

We’ve been working on napping in the crib, and I’m happy to report it’s getting easier. You’ve had two long siestas (2 and 3 hours) and a whole bunch of half hour catnaps. At night you’ve blessed us with some 10-11 hour stretches, although 7-8 is more typical, and there are some days you wake up after just 5 for a feed. We’re still not on much of a consistent schedule, but we’re getting there. I can time the morning nap fairly reliably at this point. Once the afternoon hits I’m fallowing your lead when it comes to nap time.

You have discovered your fist and have given up interest in your binky. I even tried different types of binkis. No dice. Your fist is far superior. This month we’ll be introducing you to the bottle. Your two big sisters are eager to lend a helping hand!

Love Always,
Mommy and Daddy

March 10, 2018

Adding Dana to the Wall

One sign that it’s time to update the photos on the wall? When the kids can no longer recognize themselves in the. An disagreement started the other day about who was who. Both Alexis and Nicole where convinced the photo of a 18 month old Nicole was them. And that three month old photo of Alexis? Alexis was sure it was baby Dana and nothing could convince her otherwise.

I had wanted to get photos of Dana up on my wall for a while. All I needed was the motivation. Cue said motivation.

The top photo of Domingo and I is from our honeymoon, I suspect it will stay there forever. The photo of the three girls together will likely as well. Those are such special moments. I’m considering keeping the Nicole as an astronaut as the quintessential Nicole photo. I’ve been meaning to replace the photo on the left of Domingo and I with a family photo, but it’s still proving challenging. Alexis and Dana photos will likely be replaced some day with their quintessential versions at some point.

Alexis is so adorable. She noticed the new photos right away and actually thanked me for putting them up! She is amazingly consistent about always using her ‘please’, ‘thank you’s and ‘your welcome’s.

This weekend I also put up the butterfly footprints on our wall.

I had a bit of a dilemma with these. I had previously done Nicole & Alexis’ prints back when we moved into the house. At the time Dana was a daydream. I loved the frames I was using, and knew they may no longer be manufactured should I want to add another set of prints a few years down the line. So I purchased an extra frame in case the daydream came to be. I actually purchased 4 extra frames to cover all possible scenarios. A 4×6 frame in case I had the prints of a newborn child to add. Two more 8x10s in case I wanted to take all three kids’ prints from the same time period, but also wanted to keep the existing prints for my memory chest. And finally, a 10×14 as I couldn’t be sure how big a possible five year old’s feet would be and thought there was a chance I might need a bigger size. I over think everything.

I meant to also purchase a 5×7 increase the 4×6 wasn’t big enough, but there was none in stock. Wouldn’t you know the one frame I needed for Dana was that 5×7, which never came back in stock?

I thought Dana might looked tact on if I used a different frame. But I also liked the existing frames, and couldn’t find a close enough match. The solution? More butterflies! We now have two sets, when we moved in to our forever home, and when our family became complete. It might be a little too much for some people, but I like it. I did consider taking Nicole’s newborn foot print and faking a third set so I have one from when each girl was a baby, but six butterflies is probably a little too much, even for me.

Next up, a collage three years in the making. I just need to find the strength to move some furniture first.

March 6, 2018

The Bunny Done Good

Dana and I have been mostly home bodies thus far. Aside from accompany Nicole to a birthday party just shy of five weeks old, our outings have been mostly doctor related. I have been itching to get out of the house, and today felt like a good enough day to do just that.

Today Dana accompanied me for some Easter shopping. We needed new baskets, and things to go in the baskets!

The past couple years I’ve been getting the girls flip flops and jelly shoes. (I strive to fill the kids’ baskets with mostly useful things for the changing season.) The girls get excited for the shoes, but wear the flip flops for a day, and the jellies slightly longer. They just don’t find them comfortable. Instead they use their crocs for water play and hanging out near the pool. This year the Easter Bunny decided one special pair of crocs was better than two pairs of unused shoes. They take up roughly the same amount of space in the Easter basket too.

I’ve been feeling a bit guilty lately about being a mess-phobe. Back when Nicole was a toddler her preschool teacher remarked about how wonderful it was that I didn’t mind her drawing on me with chalk. So I was hoping to find something art related to put in her Easter basket. Nicole got a set of bath time finger paints for her birthday that she loved, which seemed like the perfect balance between creative freedom and controlled mess. I was about to purchase a set of six off Amazon for $20 when I decided to check target first. I’m so glad I did! They were $1 a piece! I got the full set – twice the number of colors – for each Nicole and Alexis for 60% of what I would have paid.

In years past I’ve also included sunglasses and stuffed animals, but we’re inundated with that stuff. Instead I was looking for something that can be used outside and settled on punch balloons shaped like animals. We finished it off with a chocolate bunny (for my chocolate lover), and a marshmallow bunny (for my marshmallow lover). Of course it’s one of each for each child, even though the chocolate lover will like the concept of the marshmallow bunny lollipop in concept way more than in implementation. Don’t worry, the bunny can take up the cause of finishing it after she rejects it.

I think these baskets will be the biggest hit yet. The bunny done good, and felt great getting out of the house!

This past month Datayze saw a paltry 1.5% growth in users and a whopping 23% growth in revenue. I’m now up to $627.76 per month, and it was a shorter month! It’s not the $1000/month goal I had set for myself, but I am headed in the right direction.

I intended to focus on emails again this month, however I was contacted about a nasty bug in one of my web developer apps. Given the symptoms it sounded like something that could be effecting all of those apps. I have long since wondered why those apps weren’t more popular, and now I might have an explanation. Even better, the person reporting the bug appeared eager in trying the tool again when it was fixed. It was an opportunity too good to pass up. The issue was a logic mistake with an easy fix. From initial investigation and final testing of the patch was no more than an hour. I will monitor the web development section of datayze in the coming months to see how users respond.

The amount of spam I get is starting to get out of control, and I’m the biggest culprit. Whenever someone encounters a 404: file not found error on datayze, I get an email notification. If the automated script can determine what URL the visitor likely intended, I get an email notification. A corollary to getting a lot of visitors is getting a lot of notifications. Some are for meta data files I’m not currently hosting (e.g. apple-touch-icon.png). Some of those errors are for specifications I’m not using (humans.txt, ads.txt, etc). Some are probing (e.g. wp-admin.php to see if my site uses wordpress). This information is useful, but it can wait until I’m ready to sift through the logs and plan out my next update. No need to send myself a daily notification, or fifty. Instead, I’d like to only be notified in situations that are actionable and time sensitive, such as a misspelled forum referral that can’t be auto addressed.

I’ve been spending a lot of time thinking about how I want to solve problems, and the direction I want to take certain apps. I hope to find the time this coming month to start putting plans into actions.

February 24, 2018

Too Much

This evening, as I was bending down to change Dana’s diaper and felt such a sharp pain I couldn’t help but let out a yelp and start to cry.

My pain level has been gradually increasing over the past couple of weeks. One day I’d be fine giving Dana a bath in the tub. Three days later I’d wince reaching over the edge of the tub to set her down. That yelp, which happened within earshot of my whole family, was my breaking point. I couldn’t ignore it any longer. As soon as the kids were in bed I called the advice line.

Everything is fine, but I am way, way over doing it.

When I called, I was told I shouldn’t be doing chores like vacuuming or laundry. I had just changed a load in the dryer a couple hours prior to changing that diaper. I had also spent the morning photographing my newest favorite subject, and all the moving, bend and contorting that entails to get the right angle for the shot. (Yes, I said I was done. Momtographer is never done. Besides, that was newborn photography, I’ve moved on to baby photography!)

Just when I was starting to get that nesting energy back I’m told that I need to start taking it easy again.

I’m trying to take it easy, I really am. I know the dust bunnies won’t cause any harm. But the task list that’s falling onto Domingo is totally unfair. He’s doing the cooking and the dish washing and the bed time routines and the homework and the pick up drop offs. He’s doing all my chores on top of his, and that isn’t exactly fair. He may not have given birth, but he’s had the kids’ cold now for what feels like months. Besides, I miss the dance parties with the girls. I don’t want to be taking care of myself and Dana at their expense. They need their mama too!

This week I’ll be setting my camera down. I had hoped to try again for a family photo (it gets so much harder with each additional person), but realistically next weekend will work just as well and Dana will still look just as ‘newborn’ as she does this weekend.

I told Nicole that the doctor wants mommy to have a special helper, and she’s super excited to fill the role. She likes to run upstairs and ask if I need anything. Alexis likes to ask to see my owie and give it a kiss. I have the best little helpers looking after me.

February 23, 2018

Renewed Focus

Someone once told me after having kids you become highly efficient with your time. You’re less inclined to waste it by checking Facebook at work. Instead, you’re all about getting your work done so you have you’re evenings free to be with the babes. I didn’t notice any changes in my efficiency after my first two, but boy do I now that I’m a mom of three!

I’m thriving right now on micro tasks and multi tasks.

Micro tasks are short easy tasks that involve very little mental effort. Putting the laundry away is a daunting chore, especially when there’s been so little sleep the past couple of nights. Getting the bathroom towels out of the laundry basket and rehanging them is not, especially if I’m on my way upstairs anyway. It’s much easier to find the energy to do little micro tasks than full on chores. There’s also something highly motivating about crossing off something on my todo list, no matter how small. The more micro tasks I complete, the more on top of things I feel, the more motivated I become. It’s a feedback cycle that works for me.

During the day I make a mental note of micro tasks I should do in the evening. Things like put the nail polish away, or the bed time stories we read the previous night back on the shelf. Once all the kids are asleep I spend a half hour to an hour getting things done. It feels great, and doesn’t eat up much time so I can still get a reasonable amount of sleep. Reasonable being relative of course.

My phone has gone from a fun time waster, to a useful multitasking tool. I’m shopping on the phone, something I rarely ever did before, typing up notes for blog posts or website edits, and editing photos with snapseed. Snapseed, by the way, is amazingly powerful. I have one photo where I manage to change the direction of the light source using nothing more than the exposure brush.

Where was this ability to get things done when I was supposed to be nesting and didn’t also have a newborn to care for?

February 15, 2018

A Bone to Pick

I have a bone to pick with my new camera. It’s too good. I can’t blame the camera for my mistakes any more!

I was comfortable shooting at a wider aperture because the old camera had a bit of a soft focus problem. Those itty bitty baby lashes didn’t look sharp on either side of the face. That made small issues with camera shake, depth of field or motion blur virtually undetectable. With my new camera they’re detectable! Nevermind that the image looks great for most standard printing sizes, if I can zoom in on her face enough to see the pores on her left check, I want to see them on the right as well! My new camera is rubbing it in my face that I don’t have as intuitive a sense of the depth of field as I think I do!

Kidding aside, I’ve noticed a huge jump in the quality of my images. The cameras internal logic is amazing. If I frame the image right, 9 times out of ten the end product is going to be great. The exposure compensation button makes adjusting the settings quick enough to follow the action a snap. I’m taking fewer pictures each burst, fewer frames in general, and still happy with the outcome. Aside for some depth of field ‘issue.’

They say it’s the photographer, not the camera. That’s true to an extent, clearly. A good photographer can overcome many of the limitations of a bad camera, but not all. Shoot in lower light than your camera can handle and your choice is motion blur or noise. (Or bring additional lights and equipment.) Shooting a faster subject than you’re camera can handle? Need a greater dynamic range? Your out of luck, Chuck.

Sometimes you do need better equipment to realize your limitations in order to grow.

February 12, 2018

Dana at One Month

Dear Dana,

You are the very definition of itty bity. When we brought you home you were under 6th pounds, and in the 7th percentile. You were swimming in your newborn sized going home outfit. Your legs were so skinny that your footed sleepers might as well have been a blanket. Whenever you pulled your legs up into the newborn balled position they’d come right out of the sleeper legs. Your newborn sized diapers kept falling off. We’d unwrap you from the blankets and find the diaper hanging off your butt or by your knees. You were 9 days overdue and in need of premie diapers and we still needed to fold them down so they wouldn’t disturb your umbilical cord stump! In fact, you wore premie diapers for almost two weeks!


It’s a super Dana! Tiny but mighty.

Sleep is going great, even without considering the derailment from the cold. Last night you went seven hours between feeds, and the night before you went seven and a half hours. I got to tell you, I feel like a new woman. We tried a nap in the crib for the first time yesterday and not a moment too soon. I noticed you put your legs up, just like Nicole did when transitioning to the crib from the rock n play, but at least you didn’t wake up. I’ve also put you down awake several times and watched you shut your eyes, drifting off to sleep on your own. It will be hard not to rock you through every naptime but I want to encourage these good sleeping habits of yours.


This looks familiar. You sure do like getting on your side.

You’re starting to get interested in the world around you. You’re not grabbing yet, but should something reach your palm you will bring it to your mouth. You’re tracking with your eyes, and sometimes move your head as well.
You also enjoy watching your big sisters. Speaking of whom, you’re big sisters adore you. They love to hold you, hug you, and show you toys. They bring your picture to their respective schools to show off “their” baby.


Birth Anoucement Photo

I can tell you’re going to keep Daddy and I on our toes. Nicole and Alexis had so many similarities, I expected you to take after them. In many ways you do, but in others you are clearing marching to the beat of your own drum. One surprising difference? You could take or leave the binkie.

Love Always,
Mommy and Daddy

February 7, 2018

Courage and Confidence

I’d be lying if I said there were never times when the prospect of 3 kids didn’t overwhelm me. Pregnancy is 9 months, and no matter how on top and in control I feel when we start trying for another baby, inevitably there are moments that make me question my sanity. When I was pregnant with Alexis, Nicole went through a very difficult sleep phase, which meant no sleep for any of us. This time around it was coordinating two different school schedules that made the prospect of another child feel completely unmanageable. How in the world was I going to make this work?

Someone told me that while the three can seem overwhelming since the adults are out number, in practice you’re so experienced by this point that it’s no big deal. That is proving true for us. Domingo is back at work (kind of, he’s home sick) and my parents have flown back to their home. It’s just me and Dana during the day.

The first time Domingo returned to work leaving me home alone with a baby I remember being overwhelmed. I was unsure of myself and my abilities. When Alexis was born I was nervous about the first time watching both a toddler and a baby by myself. What if they both needed me at the same exact moment? Even when I was more sure of myself I still relied on a helping hand from Domingo on days he’d work from home.

This time around has been very different. Whether it’s Dana and I hiding out on the weekend to (unsuccessfully) avoid the family cold, the middle of the night wakings wakings for food and diaper changes, or just Dana and me during the week, I got this. I am the master of one handed sponge baths. Domingo can work from home without fear of frequent interruptions. Today I even managed to take footprints on my own. The trick, I found, was not facing baby’s feet. When I did that, I had to hold the paper in front of me and pull her feet towards it. It’s awkward, difficult to see and leads to a lot of smearing. It was far easier to sit parallel to baby so I could see what I was doing. We’re still working on handprints. I have no idea how I managed them with Alexis, even with the extra help.

Here are my tips for saving your sanity when adding another baby to the mix:

  • Buy gear in duplicates, overstock. Yes, I know it seems wasteful, especially if this is your last baby, but you can’t put a price on sanity. I have a rock n play, pile of burp cloths and binkies, diapers and changing pads by the upstairs and downstairs rocking chairs. (Yes, I have multiple rocking chairs – 3 to be exact.) If I need to go upstairs because it’s big kid movie time, or downstairs because it’s big kid bath time I know I will have everything I need. As a first time mom it makes sense to prefer quality over quantity. Beyond, my advice is to go the other way – buy cheaper if it means you can have multiple. Gently used stuff can always be resold or donated for a tax write off.
  • Get ride of anything that wasn’t used the last time. Yes those hideous onesies from great aunt Edna’s dentist are in great shape. They’ve been holding up well since they’ve never been worn. What makes you think you’ll put them on this baby if you didn’t put them on the last one? They’re just clutter at this point. The more you have, the more time is wasted looking for the ones you are willing to put on the baby. Save yourself the effort, give them to someone who will use them. Same goes for any baby item you haven’t used yet, no matter how expensive.
  • When it comes to time and attention, quality beats quantity. When kids are old enough to hold on to their jealousy, rather than just feel it in the moment I really like our one-in-one special time to be things they can do that the baby can’t to reiterate how much fun it is to be big. Currently I’m working on a treasure hunt we’re the final clue leads them to my little pony lip gloss.
February 4, 2018

Neonate’s First Cold

A couple days after bringing Dana home from the hospital, the Alexis’ cold crested. I called the advice nurse wanting to get ahead of the germs and spare my 6-day-old her first cold. It may have been overkill, but with all the news articles about the worst flu in decades, and associated deaths, I was not about to chance it. Not to worry, the nurse assured me, neonates rarely get colds. To steady my nerves and as a precaution, she gave me some tips and warning signs to watch out for.

The week passed, Domingo and my mom caught the cold but Dana, Nicki and I avoided it.

Then, on Saturday morning I noticed some of the funny rapid breath breathing sounds coming from Dana I had been warned to watch out for. The episode was short lived. Her breathing quickly returned to normal, and she otherwise seemed fine. No nasal discharge, no cough. At noon, each breath became audible as they were forced through the now obvious congestion. My baby was sick. The moment that realization struck me, as if on cue, she cried and everything got so much worse.

Dana couldn’t both breath and cry at the simultaneously, so each cry was punctuated by a grunting snort which made her even madder, which then made the breathing sound that much more labored. I couldn’t calm her, not with singing or rocking, couldn’t get her to latch or take the binky.

My not yet two weeker had her first cold, and it was terrifying.

While juggling the phone to call the pediatrician I somehow managed to get her calm enough to stop crying, and while the snorting temporarily subsided I watched her clavicle rise and fall with each breath as she struggled against the congestion.

Since Dana was so young, and I had reported fussiness while nursing, the pediatrician wanted to see her to rule out possible dehydration and confirm no fluid in the lungs. When babies are so tiny small problems can develop into big ones fast. Little passageways can become blocked easily. Thankfully everything checked out well. Her lungs were clear, oxygen level was fine. The pediatrician even confirmed it is just a cold and the scary flu. Just a cold. Dana will be fine in a couple of weeks. We are just going to be in for some long, sleepless and stress filled nights in the meantime.

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